Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Lit Up

Dear horses,

You're turned out during the day so you can be supervised. As a result, I'd suggest NOT doing anything stupid as I am then forced to bring you in and shove you back in your stall. If you want to be out, then be sensible. Also? Stop growing so much hair. I'm starting to get really worried about how nasty this winter is going to be, based on how hairy you all are.

resigned,
the bringer of nomms, wrangler of hoses, and mover of horses.

Dear body,

Yes, I know - winter is coming. But please to be ignoring that little fact and stop with the random aches and pains that seem to serve no more point than to tell me that it is raining. Or below 40. I already know that and don't need a reminder. When you can predict weather rather than just telling me the obvious, I'll reconsider.

yours with ibuprofen,
me.

Dear cats,

You have water. And food. Drink that and eat that, rather than licking the bottom of the bath tub. And yelling at me every time I move towards the kitchen. Guess what - the kitchen is in the center of the apartment. 50% of my movements are thus towards the kitchen and yet, not destined for the kitchen.

love,
the one who cleans the litter boxes.

Dear sock that went missing,

Please come back. I promise to pet you and love you and I have even found the missing DPN to make sure that my gauge will be spot-on. It is hard to give you the attention you deserve when you are in hiding.

love,
the one who needs to finish up Christmas knitting.

Dear apartment,

Please clean yourself. Or at least, spit out all the hay and straw. That's half the cleaning battle. I doubt that the cats can be persuaded to stop shedding, so we're just going to have to deal with that.

love,
the one who lives here.

Dear HWIA,

Thanks for living up to your name. Please continue to do so. But if you want to stop making me snort beer out my nose, that'd be cool too.

love,
me.

Dear you,

You continue to defy my ability to describe/summarize you. I think I like that. I know I like you. Please call me soon, ok?

love,
me.

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